I’ll Be Honest
I’ll be honest…two weeks ago I had heard the word Autism, yet never paid attention to how it affected other people because it didn’t affect me.
I’ll be honest up…until two weeks ago I have also heard the word Asperger’s and had always thought what a crazy word Asperger’s was and why they would give a diagnosis that name and then have someone say that word out loud? Don’t they hear how the first part of the word sounds?
I’ll be honest… two weeks ago those words change my life, my son’s life and my family’s life. My beautiful son that has reading skills off the charts, computer skills that leave me in the dust and a vocabulary that leaves adults searching for dictionaries was recently given a diagnosis of High Functioning Autism also known as Asperger’s.
I’ll be honest…My son, who is a little bit quirky, has always been a troubled sleeper, a heavy duty talker, and often what we call the third parent in our family. Because of Aspergers he follows the rules like he is in the military and expects his siblings to comply. Now he has a label that points him out as a little bit different.
I’ll be honest…we already knew our son was a little bit quirky, so full of love, and full of individuality. A diagnosis does not change him in our family; it will change him in the eyes of others. We will need to work at changing how people think around us to accept him for who he is my son, an 11 year old with High Function Autism.
I’ll be honest…this task will not be easy, he is in middle school. Entering into the major judgment arena where everyone must fit in and those that don’t, are cast aside. My son works so hard to fit in at school that when he arrives home, he needs to unravel for a while before he can relax and feel safe.
I’ll be honest…I have been thrown into a fast paced course to learn everything I can about Aspergers and expect I will have my expertise hat on by the end of the year. If I want to become a positive advocate for my son then I need to come prepared with information.
I’ll be honest, my heart does hurt and I feel sad about the diagnosis. Not ashamed, I am proud of my son, and I know he will do fine. I am worried about how he will be treated in school through middle school and high school. I do not want my son to take on having children hurt him because they don’t understand that he is differently-able not specially- abled.
I’ll be honest, I am terrified of what the future will bring but know that I must slow down and take each day one at a time. I must learn to lean on others for support, seek encouragement from family and friends. Most importantly I need to make sure that I take time for myself.
I’ll be honest… two weeks ago I didn’t know the word Aspergers would affect my life, but I do now and I will do all I can to support my child through this process.
I’ll be honest – I am a mother to a son with High Functioning Autism/Aspergers and I wouldn’t change my son in anyway. I love him, his originality and how special he is to me and our family.